[GW2] Payback

[Azzerhoden]

In hindsight, it had seemed like a great idea, an idea worthy of hearty laughs for many years to come and justified payback on old maid Hannah.   At 22 winters, Hannah should be more worried about her lack of a husband, not scolding Järn about her clean laundry that he had 'accidently' gotten muddy.   

The plan had been simple enough.  Järn was going to take advantage of the possessive tendencies of the Red Bees in guarding their rich honey.  Found throughout the Wayfarer's Hills, it would be simple enough to lure them into Hannah's kitchen by coating fresh apples with the fragrant fare.  Hannah would come home from the morning community work, see the bees, and scream hysterically because everyone in Hoelbrak knew of her fear of bees.

"Payback", thought Järn, "Is better than bashing a dredge first thing in the morning."

A few mornings after concocting such a brilliant plan, and after Järn was sure Hannah had left her house, he snuck around to the kitchen window and thickly started coating the apples using his mother's bone handled basting brush.  Every time Järn finished an apple, he placed it on the windows sill, knowing the draft of the house would blow the honey scent down along the meadow.  To make sure the bees would fully enter the house, Järn tossed a few back into the room as well.

Then he heard a sound from the back room that sounded like a body stirring.  With his heart suddenly pounding, Järn quickly finished up the remaining apples, and toss them in as well.   More sounds followed, and Järn quickly made his exit from the yard, turned the corner around a clump of small trees, and ran toward the base of the Shiverpeaks, assured that the he was safely away.  After seeing that the sun had moved it's width in the morning sky he stopped running and turned toward the closest creek to catch some fish, confident that good catch would make his claims of innocence easier for the village to accept.

What Järn had not known was that the sounds he had heard had not come from the back room, but had come from outside the house.  What he did not know was that Hannah was still sound asleep in the back bedroom, between the thick covers of her bed (and as bare as a newly born babe).  He also did not know that Hannah was not alone in her bed, for Knut Whitebear was asleep as well, also bare, but sleeping on top of the covers.  Fortunately he laid on his stomach, for the Red Bees of the Warfarer's Hills are also known for their ferocity when riled from their huge hives.  And riled they were.  For the sound that Järn had heard was caused by two bear cubs who had just raided a Red Bee hive, and were now the object of attention by almost the entire hive.  Mostly immune to the stings, the cubs could smell the fresh honeyed apples on the sill, as well as those further in the house, which they quickly sought out after devouring those in easy reach.  Knut, current leader of the village of Hoelbrak, slowly stirred at the disturbance of the cubs and swatting at the fly crawling across his backside.

Except it wasn't a fly he swatted.  It was a red bee.

This lead to a rapid red bee response, who immediately showed its overall displeasure on that exposed backside, along with the several of the closest friends, which immediately lead to a rather rude wake up call for the drowsy Knut.

Bellowing a war cry populated with dredge curses, he swatted at the swarms while quickly looking for his pants, his axe, and something to swing at.  Hannah woke, saw the bees and added her hysteria.  The cubs, suddenly aware of their surroundings and the smell of Norn, added in their cries of alarm.  Momma bear, who would never be found far from her wandering cubs, added in her own thoughts of the entire situation.

The rest of Hoelbrak, hearing the commotion, dropped everything they were doing and ran to the house of Hannah, where they were rewarded with cubs rushing out a freshly bashed door to join their mother in escaping to the foot hills, followed by a still bare but red welted Knut and a blanket wearing Hannah.  After which was followed by the angry bellowing of Mrs. Knut Whitebear, a rapidly swinging dough roller, and the howling laughter of the residents of Hoelbrak, including Järn's parents.

That is, until they spotted the honey coated bone handled basting brush resting on the table near Hannah's window.  Järn had forgotten to take it with him in his rush to make his get-away.

"Which is why", Järn thought with irony, "I'm sitting up in the cold guarding a snow packed pass.  Not even allowed inside the guard hut to warm my frozen toes".  Spying movement along the trail he was set to watch, Järn quickly deduced it was a dredge attempting to sneak by.  Reaching behind his back for the hammer that rested there, Järn rethought the wisdom (or lack there-of) that had lead him to this point.  "Maybe, just maybe, bashing a dredge early in the morning IS better then getting payback".