evil plotting (an everquest tale)

[tanare]

at last I have infiltrated this hive of honor and likeability Kyria thought to herself as she evilly peeked out through a keyhole into the  Saga guild headquarters. the unrelenting evil toil of her undead minions to dig the secret tunnel underneath their headquarters, with only minor setbacks such as when Vebn accidently breached the underground river which supplied the wells in the area, or when Xobn emerged in the hall of paladins, or after Liks discovered that patch of magma along the route, to delay her evil schemes. but now, in a space a closet may have found enclosed, Kyria managed to have entered an unused re-plastered section of the hall and had her minions drill a tiny hole which fortuitously lined up with the aforementioned key hole and her plans were complete.

that foolish gnomish bearer of truth will long rue the day his honesty revealed everything I needed to evilly foil his plans and gain the knowledge required to conquer Ak-Anon once and for all underneath my undead army.   Kyria paused in her mental gloating as Vorn elbowed her in the ribs. the undead for no reason feeling required to stay next to his mistress despite the cramped conditions. Kyria would have preferred to banish it but the sound of it's clattering bones would no doubt alert the fools dwelling in ignorance of her presence that they were not alone. As Xibn had foiled her earlier attempt with his rattling bones for her evil scheme to evilly bring these "Sagaites" down she had to be extra cautious.

If only I had the wealth to begin my activities now. then I could murder that gnome in a most evil way, then torture one of it's kin to reveal the secrets of his research notes he no doubt stores here which thanks to my evilly planned tunnel I can, at my leisure, break into these halls at will. of course the fool revealed his gnomish trickery which will require me to obtain speakers of all languages whom I can then torture to reveal whether the gnomish captive I would be torturing is truly speaking it's own tongue when translating the notes for me. then with that knowledge I shall unleash my evil might upon the gnomes and bring them under my heel. bwahahahahaha! kyria thought to herself as she refreshed her invisibility vs undead spell to ensure she would not be detected my the halls' guardians.

After watching for several minutes where nothing at all happened. Kyria nodded in satisfaction as her evil scheme would go undetected by the foolish lighties. Elbowing Vorn aside in evil revenge for his earlier poke (which the undead didn't react to in the slightest), Kyria made her way back down the tunnel, which as part of her evil plan for this phase of the operation, had a ladder for ease of climbing up or down, which kyria was certain, no lighty would ever consider.  As she exited now all that was left was for her to wait for the gnome to fall in some battle somewhere. then all his knowledge would be hers, for the glory of evil bwahahahahahaha!

[tanare]

"what do you mean this isn't enough?" Kyria demanded of the lowly rogue who dared dent her demand. "i have 3 platinum here to purchase that mansion over there for my evil plots and you claim it is worth more?"

Rolling his eyes as his fellow tier-dal ranted on. it was something the merchant was accustomed to being tier-dal himself. especially among the casters- they always thought their magic made them better than everyone and that's not even counting the ones that were of the nobility- or at least claimed they were. but when he heard of a necromancer seeking a new home he thought they would at least make a serious offer. The manuion in question was lost by some killed off minor noble and was more of a small fortress than a house. high walls surrounded it, watchtowers set up at the corners of the walls and a gated front entrance leading to the courtyard where the three storied mansion itself set. plenty of room despite some outer neglect having sat for so long unowned. something the merchant figured he could get at least 10000 playinum for. and this idiot ws offering 3, no not three thousand, just three platinum for.

"listen if you're just going to waste my time i'm leaving. come back when you're actually serious." he answered with a dismissive wave turning his back on the robed woman and her undead pet and walking back into the city.

he shall pay for that indignity some day for daring to foil my plans I have most carefully and evilly planned. perhaps he is working with the gnomes himself. oh to be there when THAT treachery is revealed. I shall take great pleasure in striking him down. But now I must reassess. clearly these decaying sketons and wolves I have been striking down with my wrath do not carry sufficient wealth to speed my evil plans along sufficiently. I must alter the arrangement and pray that I might not have to alter it further. Kyria thought to herself in wrath as she made her way back to the cramped one room apartment she was able to afford at the present.  Walking slowly she pondered her plan to conquer ak-anon and destroy the gnomes there when she saw it.

The sign was greatly tattered and the ink had faded but an evil smile crossed her face as she read it and savored the irony such an ironic undertaking would bring forth were it to succeed. There on the wanted poster was the answer she sought. "WANTED" it stated, "DEAD OR ALIVE! Captain Maladominus of the Dread Gnomish Pirates- 20,000 platinum. " then in much smaller print "500pp reward for other gnomish pirates. for reasons of thievery, piracy and being general pains in the posterior, and gnomes. see Mynor Payne in Freeport for details."

bwahahahahahaha! Kyria thought to herself. using gnomes to fund my plan to conquer ak anon will prove the brilliance of my plotting once and for all. to bring down these gnomish so-called heroes, as all gnomes are no doubt thieves if you dig down far enough- hmm another experiment I must try later, to inspire fear in them at my coming and make them hate my triumphs over them. and with this captain alone I could buy TWO of those miserable mansions from that rogue and teach him his place. Yes all brilliantly plotted. I will not fail now. But there is just one detail to be discovered. Kyria finished with a slight frown as she turned to her undead minion standing by faithfully. "Xander, where exactly is Freeport anyway?"

[tanare]

At last I have entered Freeport to find these fools- gnomes no doubt- who I shall use to fund my campaign to conquer the very city from under their extrelmely large noses BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Kyria thought to herself as she pulled the hood of her cloak over her head so no one would recognize her as she made her way to the docks where this Mynor Payne and discover the location of the rich bounties these Dread Gnome Pirates had on their heads.

Concealing her identity would be needed in case the pirates had spies of their own at the docks so they couldn't plot their revenge once her successes grew. Plus there were parts of town where her mere presence would be enough for the guard to be summoned, the paladins that is, the regular guard was quite corrupt and no doubt be putty in her hands were she to release her evil ploys against them.

Finally making her way to her destination, a run down place called the "Happy Halfling", to be expected from such an insignificant race. She stepped inside and approved of the shadows within. No one would be getting a good view of anyone here. Sensing the eyes of everyone within on her she ignored them and made her way to the bar where the bartender, a scar faced human looked at her expectantly.

"I'm looking for Mynor Payne, I have business with him." Kyria said softly looking the barkeep full in the eyes revealing her purple skin to encourage his compliance. bwahahahaha! no doubt he will be so intimidated he will grant me whatever I wish in the presence of my evil might

"Who?" the barkeep responded in a bored tone as Kyria grew wrathful. how dare he shrug of the intimidating presence of my evil will! who does he think he is???

"Mynor Payne, I said. did that scar ruin your hearing?" Kyria replied impolitely.

"I hear just fine but if that person was around here their location wouldn't just be given away after all. bad business to just give things away." the barkeep answered.

Ah yes i had forgotten. Kyria reminded herself. these petty thieves often require payment for their services. would that I could just torture the information out of him- hmm perhaps he knows gnomish, nevermind that, the walls are too thin and too many people would get in the way were I to unleash my full evil fury upon this fool. so I shall have to play their game.

"Very well then.has your memory improved?" she asked sliding a gold piece across to the bartender. then when he didn't budge she slid a second before he swept across the bartop with his cleaning rag and the coins disappeared.

"he might be around, let me go check. what's this about anyway?" the barkeep finally responded.

"Just tell him someone in interested in dealing with a 'dreaded' matter." Kyria asked pleased at her own cleverness in her wording. "And if you think to run out with my gold you'll find that to be a bad idea." she added not wanting to think she was an easy mark.

Rolling his eyes the barkeeper answered "Listen lady, I make more than this in a couple hours. wait here."

the barkeeper then disappeared to the back of the bar for several minutes while Kyria looked around the tavern. Just a bunch of shorties, probably halflings, no doubt their are cowering in the boots in the presence of such evil. no threat to me at all no doubt even were one fo scrape up whatever dregs of courage they could find at the bottom of their cups.

Just then the barkeep returned. "He says ok he'll meet with you, out the back door of this place. let's go."

"Why wouldn't he want to stay indoors?" Kyria asked suspiciously.

"He said he wants room to run if you turn on him. he's not very fond of your kind, but he does want the matter you brought up settled." the barkeep replied. "Now I don't have all day and neither does he, are you coming or not?"

"Fine." Kyria said as she came around the bar and followed the barkeep into the back area and to the kitchen where the gnome and Halfling cooks looked at her before promptly ignoring her. As they came to the far wall the barkeep unlocked and opened the door leading into an alley. "there you go, I don't want to know anything that goes down so I can't be asked later so off you go." the barkeep said holding the door open.

As soon as she stepped through he closed the door and she heard the click of a lock behind her. The alleyway was dark and more importantly empty. "Where are you? show yourself." she demanded as she decided it was time to summon one of her undead minions as she traveled through town to this point without one to further conceal her progress through the city. Unfortunately she had only just began the incantation when a voice above her said "The Dread Gnome Pirates aren't no easy prey!" and as she looked up she saw the net descending down upon her.

(the next morning)

The brothers Timmy and Jimmy were out playing in the commonlands as they often did when they were supposed to be keeping an eye out for wolves to protect the family's sheep grazing in the area. But the youngsters at age 9 and 7 were easily bored and after all it was their father and older brothers who would deal with the wolf, they just had to shout when they saw one.

Going into the more wooded area they found the oddest thing. There was a large potato sack hanging from a tree a couple feet off the ground, with a note tied it. More interestingly the bag was moving despite there being no wind. Being young boys, curiosity won out quickly and they ran over to the sack.

"it's moving." the older Timmy announced as Jimmy nodded in agreement.

"Whaddya think is inside?" JImmy asked.

"Dunno. go find a stick" Timmy ordered

"Why me?" Jimmy asked

"Cause i'm older and we should poke the bag so if there's something bad inside we'll know." Timmy explained

"Oh ok- that's why ma says you're the smart one all the time." Jimmy said impressed by his brother's wisdom. In short order he cam back with a two foot long inch thick piece of wood. "Ok here ya go."

"Why are you giving it to me?" Timmy asked.

"Cause you're older." Jimmy said trapping his older brother neatly.

"ok fine." Timmy said and poked the sack with the stick only to hear a muffled grunt.

"That sounds like a person!" the wide eyed Jimmy said.

"Maybe." Timmy said poking it again harder getting a louder grunt. "Yup sounds like a person. we should cut it down."

"Wonder who played a prank like that on someone? I bet it was Ruddy Bob. like that time he threw cousin lem's shoes up into the tree because he took his whittling knife knowin lem was scared of heights." Jimmy rambled excitedly.

"Ok let's cut it down." Timmy said, Pausing before the note he added. "Wonder what's all that writing say?"

"I can't read either ya know Timmy." Jimmy protested. "Hurry up."

So Timmy took his pocket knife, not much in the way of a weapon but good for cutting  and sawed away at the rope holding the sack up as the voice within mumbled more loudly. Finally the weight of the sack finished the job and it crashed to the ground with a thud and angry noises from within.  As it moved around the brothers silently agreed that whatever was in there sound kind of mat but again curiosity won out and they began untying the top of the bag and when the bag opened at last the boys turned around screaming in terror as the sight of a bound and gagged Tier-dal woman with silver hair and purple skin wearing only her undergarments who immediately began yelling at them through the gag.

Those pipsqueaks are the ones who kept poking me like that. They will pay Kyria seethed with death in her eyes blinking through the brightness of the day after being stuffed in the sack like she was by those gnomish thieves who ambushed her, stripped her of her belongings including her purse, tied her up and tossed her into the sack. Then to have that Mynor Payne person himself tell her that's what happens to people who look for the DGP as he closed the sack. The next thing she knew she was tossed on a cart and brought out here where they had left her.

Those gnomes will pay, they thought they have seen the last of me? oh no, a most evil revenge will I make them suffer. I will grow stronger and return and level their entire race into oblivion starting with them. I shall use them as my translators and cut their tongues out one by one if they even think of lying to me. But first I must free myself from this embarrassment before those insolent youths return with others. Fortunately the fool dropped his knife so I can cut these ropes and plan my revenge. I have heard of potential allies, fellow necromancers in a place called befallen. I shall use them to get my revenge on these gnomes. Then I shall... WHAT DOES THIS SAY?

As she squirmed her way towards the dropped knife, Kyria happened to have her gaze settle on the note still attached to the sack. It was written in the common tongue and was a quite simple warning as kyria raged at the sight of it planning new tortures and vengeance at the simple "Caution: grumpy tier-dal within. do not disturb." message it held.

[tanare]

BWAHAHAHAHHA! I can't believe I talked these fools into coming to the Warrens where I shall overthrow their king and rule this kingdom as part of my extremely clever and complicated plan to destroy the gnomes with legions of kobolds. Kyria thought evilly to herself as she and her "companions" entered the kobold realm known as the warrens.

The rest of the fools who fell for her evil manipulations to bring her to power were a useful lot no doubt. Their names were unimportant to her and barely remembered. the chanter was useful enough with his mana replenishment spells and the half breed healer she supposed was useful in her own way to keep the others alive long enough to achieve her goals. Of course Kyria knew she did not need her pnuy healing as she would suck the very life out of her foes to restore herself if needed. The warrior that came along made a good punching bag and the runt priestess that showed up later proved useful in helping to settle down any insurgents disputing afterwards. The only worthwhile one was the teir-dal rogue, though the ignorant fool had no clue of Kyria's evil reputation throughout norrath- no doubt a sheltered city-rat in her youth.

In any event, the task at first seemed foolishly easy as the outer guards cowered fearfully and fled the cavern rather than face their might. Even once they made their way down to the lower levels where the elite troops were found proved to be no real match for the group. The biggest issue was when the cowardly kobolds tried to flee to get reinforcements which could prove to be troublesome. Of course the other fools paid no mind to it amidst their slaughter and so it was up to her to bind them in chains of darkness to keep them from running. Though at times her evil minion Gobaner was sent off to deal with the most cowardly among them. Alas her minion at times proved too ambitious in trying to fulfill her desires and Kyria was forced to call him back when he was about to raise the entire cave system against them. Approving of her minion's eagerness to help, Kyria only reluctantly restrained him. The king still lived, it was too soon.

Moving out, the group systematically wiped out the reistance. Their weapons maker and smith were dispatched quickly to ensure no weapons of rebellion would be forged once the kingdom was hers. Then onto deal with the priesthood, cutting the head off of their healers and in a stroke of luck the Prince who was visiting them. With their religious leaders gone and the next in line to the throne out of the picture no figureheads for the kobolds to rally behind would be left. Everything was following her evil plan perfectly except for one minor thing.

In her effort to get rich off the kobold's suffering, Kyria had begun collecting the bronze weapons from the fallen to be sold for several platinum coins each on the outside. Unfortunately, she had failed to realize just how many the smith had forged and in short order found herself barely able to walk dragging the large sack of weapons with her. Of course knowing what sort of evil plans her so-called companions had  in store for her she refused to show her discomfort and claimed she was merely walking in a slow stately manner as befits a tier-dal of the necromantic arts.

I must have my underlings collect all these weapons once I have seized power and established my rule here. then all the untold riches shall be mine! she thought to herself

finally the group entered the grand throne room where both the king and Hig Shaman held court admist their most elite guards. of course the guards were no match for the group but someone must have raised an alarm- no doubt the king had some sort of hidden pull chord to summon the barracks to his aid in times of need. But slowly the group drew closer fighting through the guards. But the Kyria saw her chance, as they neared the throne a sudden ambush attacked the group from the adjoining room and chais spread through the battle. one lesser kobold managed to warn the king and high shaman and they too were drwn into the fight. as the rest of the group- no doubt screaming and panicing in terror- confronted the King. Kyria decided to show the high shaman the true power of unfettered evil and faced him along despite a mild tremor of uncertainty that the shaman seemed to possess more power than even she.

But no matter, a lowly shaman would not be a match for evil incarnate herself. Binding him with darkness, boiling his blood, riddling him with disease one after the other as he vainly tried to heal hiomself. Then attacking her directly Kyria laughed most evilly to herself as she then began to drain the lifeforce of the high shaman to restore what he took from her in battle. Of course, the shaman fought desperately as the whimpering cries of fear from her companions facing the King led her to realize she would have to save them as well. though severely depleting her own mana, Kyria's slow and steady assault on the shaman's life proved too much for even his ehaling to keep up with and so he fell to her might.

Meanwhile the king brought additional minions to the battle as Kyria sent Gobaner in to assist while she sat back and tried to restore her mana. of course she soon realized that her companions would be doomed if she did not act and with her mana so low her odds of defeating him once they had all fallen were slim. So using the last of her mana she saved the others and the king finally fell. victory was theirs! The king was dead, her path to ruling was clear except for one thing. The rest of her "companions"

Mistress one of the kobolds is fleeing. shall I deal with it? Gobaner asked her through the mental link kyria shared with her undead minions

"This is my chance!" Kyria thought to herself. The others have been worn down by the fighting, if that one escapes he can summon enough survivors that even those weaklings could finish off the rest of the group. No let it go. defend me instead she told Gobaner

understood mistress  Gobaner said returning to her side as she began to meditate.

"Can someone snare this?!" the petrified warrior shouted as he tried to chase down the runner, only attracting more kobolds drawn to the sounds of his fearful crying. As the group began to get separated the others realized their danger and ran off to aid their companion. Of course Kyria would not abandon her sack of weapons and after meditating for a bit, slowly walked after them, knowing she could loot the king and shaman later once the others were dead- plus whatever hshe could loot from her companions after they were dead of course too.

The sounds of battle could be heard down the tunnels which meant the others hadn't been overwhelmed yet. Turning the corner she saw a desperate fight as the others faced nearly a dozen kobolds. Hoping to stay out of sight and show up "just too late to save them" one of the kobolds fled in her direction and Gobaner responded as he had commanded and attacked it drawing Kyria to the attention of the  rest. the fight was desperate for the others and with a secret smile Kyria watched with glee as the half breed healer fell to the kobolds. The rest would surely follow now as Gobaner was keeping her save ensuring she would be the freshest after the fight.

Unfortunately for her most evil and clever plan, the enchanter proved to be skilled beyond her expectations and kept the foe neutralized despite her orders to Gobaner to "accidently" break the spells that had them mesmerized. In far too short a fashion the enemy fell and with the bulk of the elite troopers now dealt with the warrens had finally fallen to her. As she was about to finish off her now unnecessary 'comrades" her evil plan was foiled by the appearance of the lazy runt of a cleric who belatedly showed up after all the hard work was over and restored the fallen half breed putting the odds against Kyria were she to strike now.

However the complex had fallen. returning to the throne room, Kyria made her way to her newly conquered throne while the others grubbed amongst the blood and innards to find a few scraps of interest, which she insisted be distributed by a die roll. Of Course Kyria used her most evilly loaded dice, which she had to admit- she found disappointed that the rogue did not note- and claimed the king's collar as well as his throne for her own.

Now with the kobolds leaderless and directionless she knew this would be her time to establish her rule. "in the interest of keeping Paineel safe from kobold depravations" she told the others when they questioned her decision. These fools having no clue that I shall instead raise an army of kobolds to send against the gnomes and destroy Ak-Anon once and for all she chuckled evilly to herself.

As the others decided the kobold threat had been broken they all made ready to depart with their ill-begotten gains from HER realm. But she knew the remaining kobolds were too weak to finish them off properly, so she let them head off claiming to catch up later.

At that point, one of the weaker kobolds came to approach its new queen she told it "Bring to me all your riches so that I may make an accounting of my new wealth and we shall begin to rebuild under my evil reign" she cackled dreaming of bronze weapons, gold and jewels of great value. Instead the kobold just looked at her blankly.

"Didn't you hear me?" she asked in an annoyed tone. how dare this puny thing ignore it's QUEEN! she said to herself.

The kobold continued to sit and star with a confused look on it's face. Then it hit her. These things don't speak common. no matter I shall use a civilized tongue and repeated her request in the tier-dal langued. Nothing. Elder tier-dal. nothing. reluctantly she even tried trollish. still nothing.

"Don't any of you things speak a proper language?!?!" she demanded. In response the kobold barked and scratched behind it's ear.

Suddenly it dawned on Kyria This can not be. if i can;t communicate with these things how will i be able to rule them? Without being able to properly threaten them with my evil might how will i keep them in line. Why they could be plotting to overthrow me as i speak and i would never know it because i don;t speak kobold! They could be planning to murder me in my sleep, even Gobanker couldn;t protect me if there were enough of them. And these things breed quickly i've heard. Once they get back to full strength they'll try a coop. And the others have abandoned me here alone while they get rich off my efforts here! leaving me to die here alone. Oh they will pay for this! But first "GUYS! WAIT UP! I'm coming with you!"

As she slowly dragged her sack of bronze weapons behind her. Kyria vowed vengenace on everything she could think of, including her language tutors who failed to realize how important learning the kobold language would be. She would need a new plan. But she knew of a perfect place for her to take over next. A rumored den of fellow necromancers where she could take over and bring forth an army of the dead to destroy ak-anon. the ruins of befallen.