The Artists of Destruction: FEAR US!

[Bullwhip Bass]

Bullwhip glares at Cataclysta

So what....elfs are all the same.  Small, weak, and softskinned.  They all taste good....when can we eats them?  And elfs probably eats grass...like cows..

[Cataclysta]

Catalysta stares back at Bullwhip, her lisp growing even more pronounced as she grows nervous about their grand kidnapping ploy that isn't quite going according to her plans....did they even have a concrete plan?

Bullwhip you uzelezz brute!  We can't eatzz them!  We need them alivez for our mazterplan!  Make yourzelf uzeful!  Go to the market and fetch zome grazz and fayberryz for theze ztupid prizzy elvzz!  For all we know they eat fried Arazai wingz! Go now and alzo check the rock to the left of the bell in Timorouz Deep dockz.  They should hazz put the ranzom there by now if they care about theze elvzz, don't you think?!

Cataclysta peers over Scorching's wings at the image on the canvas, in awe.  A slow smile creeps over Cat's lips.

Zizter, I've alwayz thought of your art az weak, but you do have a giftzz for truly capturing the fearzz in their eyez....have you ever thought about using elvzz blood in your paintingz? 

A sadistic smile appears across Cat's face.

Now, enough zentimentality!  We have a lotzz to do!  Zee, you get your chanze to exzprezz your art but I have to wait eonz to ezprezz mine!  Mine will be the greatezt pieze of art any Norrathian haz ever zeen or witnezzed!  Qeynoz!  In flamezz and chaozz!  A majeztic exzplozion of fire and color! Zzzzo beautiful!  My heart achez with joy juzt thinking about it!!

The Arasai flutters her wings excitedly and looks down at the slowly moving sacks. 

Which remindz me, we need to take control of Zaga, otherwize how are we going to zneak in all that dynamite?  The ztupid Down Below plan didn't work becauze of that Freeport zmuggling ring zituation mizunderzztanding.... Grrrr I hate Freeportian zcum!

Sees Callysta's hand slowly creeping out of the sack and freezes, not knowing what her next move should be now that Bullwhip, the muscles behind the operation, has gone off to check the ransom site.

Oh oh....zizter? Iz that one...iz that one the 'chanter?  We were zuppozed to keep her in a different room! 

Flies nervously back and forth across the room.

[Scorching]

"No, no the enchantress was the red haired one. The red haired one cried and screamed about hair and makeup and how much too pretty she was to be captured with the the others we took?" The arasai's tone is flat, with virtually no emphasis as her brush whips across the easel, tracing a streak of yellow, "Bullwhip had to take that one back after there were no more gags that could be used, but the red haired one wouldn't walk (something about dying before being seen with a Sarnak escort?) so into a bag and back to Saga the red haired one went."

"Does Sister not remember that? Scorching even asked the red haired one in between the screams and was told that the red haired one was Saga's only premier illusionist." The arasai dips her head slightly, "So none of these three other Saga could be an illusionist."

[Jezerai]

Callysta pries open the sack and steps out, ljust in time to hear the comment about Anaris being Saga's only illusionist.  "How DARE she claim to be the premier illusionist of Saga!  Everyone knows that I am the NEW premier illusionist of Saga now!" 

Looking around the shabby surroundings with a clear expression of disdain, Callysta sniffs audibly.  "What a dump!"  She tidies her dark hair and brushes her gown, noticing the two sacks on the ground.

Her gaze falls on the two bags laying on the floor. "You!"  She gestures imperiously towards Cataclysta.  "Hand me that knife!  Release my friends this instant!"  Callysta stamped her foot and then, enjoying the theatrics of it, stamps her foot again.  

Not waiting for assistance, Callysta uses her nail file to start sawing away at the cord holding the nearest bag closed, hoping against hope that the bag contains anyone except Anaris.  It occurs to her that they might have stolen one of the handsome male members of Saga, who might be suitably impressed and relieved to be rescued by a lovely lass.  Callysta takes a moment to pinch her cheeks before opening the bag, just in case.

[Lyrima]

As the bag falls open to reveal Kiaria, she smiles warmly at Callysta.

"Greetings to thee, Darling!"

She arises from the sack, acting as if she was as gorgeous and glorious as when it dropped over her head in the guild hall dressing room.

"Twas a most marvelous rest!"

Her brown eyes fall on the others in the room, "Greetings to all of thee!" She hurries over, "Tis, I, Kiaria Vakhalye, Druid of Saga and Healer of Al l!"

She smiles happily at the others, clearly expecting someone to graciously introduce themselves.  She carefully fluffs her tangled golden hair.

[Jezerai]

Callysta's face falls when she sees Kiaria rather than a handsome male and she throws a petulant pout towards the kidnappers before moving to open the third bag. 

After opening the final bag, she begins to move about the room, picking things up and inspecting them until, moving around behind Scorching, she spies the painting.  "What's this?  A painting?  Oh please!  You have the lighting all wrong!  And you aren't showing my best side!"

[Cataclysta]

Freezes in panic mode while the pretty Wood Elf demands a knife from her.  Just then, she realizes she used her knife to cut out the cork from that bottle of wine she stole from Saga's tavern because they didn't have a bottle opener. Notices Callysta is using something anyway to cut open the ropes.

I wouldn't do that if I werz youzz!

What are you doing!?  Leave the zackz alone! ZTOP IT!

Dives to the floor and wraps her arms around Callysta's ankle but looses her grip.

Blinks and gasps in disbelief as a gorgeous Koada'dal emerges from the sack and greets her amicably with a bright smile.   Then shifts her eyes toward Callysta, who has apparently forgotten she is held captive and s now playing art critic with Scorching's painting.

What...what do you know about art you prizzy elf!  WE are the Artiztz, not you!  Zizter Zcorching iz the greatezt artizt of fear there iz!  You should be zo lucky to be..HEY!  Why aren't you zcared?!  What iz WRONG with you!?  What iz the matter with ALL of you Zaga elvezz!  Thiz iz a kidnapping!  It iz a zeriouz and terrifying crime!  You should be terrified!  Why aren't you trembling!!  I don't zee you trembling!  Thiz iz incredulouz!  We are the Artiztz of Decztruction!  FEAR UZ!!!

Realizes she's too small and too weak to take on any of the Elves, but starts swatting at Callysta's robe anyway with her tiny Arasai fists.  Then pauses, panting and exhausted, to catch her breath.

You Zaga people are all inzane...Zcorching! I told you we should've gone with a Vagabond Knightz abuction inztead but noooo you zaid they were drunkz and would probably not make ranzom...I betz thoze Zaga leaderz are happy we gotz rid of their crazzzy elvz for them!

Keeps panting out of sheer exhaustion.

Zizter! What are we going to do with themz if we do not make ranzom??  They are too high maintenanze to keep for too long!  They're not even zcared!

Winces at the three Elves standing in the room.

Oh....great, and now they zee what we look like ....

Resumes her Ebil Mastermind post and stands in battle position, her height only coming up to about Kiaria's knee.

I demand you to FEAR UZ!

[Lyrima]

*crouches down to gaze sweetly at Cataclysta*

Thy wings art so pretty! Might I toucheth them?

*extends a delicate digit*

[Cataclysta]

Fills with dread as Kiaria's finger slowly extends toward her, about to touch her wings and starts stuttering on top of her lisp.

N.n...n..n..n.nnn...not th...th...not the wingzzz!!

Zizter! Help!  She'z going to touch me!

Stiffens up.

[Orrernoeth]

Aluini tumbles out of bag and starts to gag as she tries to get the dirty rags out of her mouth.  With one final yank, she pulls the rags out of her mouth and starts to cough.

"Please, would you cut these ropes off my hands, they are hurting terribly!"

With a gleam in her eyes, she holds her bound hands out to Callysta.

[Jezerai]

Callysta turns from her place observing the painting in progress and gives the third elf a scrutinizing glance.  Taking her much abused nail file, she saws through the ropes binding Aluini's hands.  "Better?"

Without waiting for a response, Callysta turns back to the kidnappers.  "This place is hardly fit for rats!"  Tapping her chin, Callysta appears deep in thought for a moment.  "Ok!  Go fetch some pillows for sitting, tea and scones because doesn't that sound wonderful?  And of course chocolate!  And fetch it quick!  This place is so dreary, don't you think?  And maybe some nice yellow curtains for the window there."  Callysta notices that her toenails are not fully painted and shrieks with horror.  "You could have WAITED until I finished painting my toenails!  Now I look like a hoyden!  And that one is smudged where it was not quite dry!  What are you, ANIMALS?"

[Orrernoeth]

As all eyes turn to Callysta's shrieking, Aluini quietly starts chanting and waving her hands.  Before anyone can stop her, Redblaze, her earth defender appears before her.

Aluini quickly points and Redblaze slowly starts moving toward Cataclysta.

[Jezerai]

Callysta sighs when she sees the earth elemental appear.  "Oh dear, I was so hoping for scones and tea."   Her face brightens as she sends a wave of sleep towards Scorching.  "Perhaps if we finish this up quickly we can be home in time for dinner!"

[Erendrel]

 The dervish spat at Erendrel's feet, glaring malignantly into the Elf's eyes. One of the guards of the Court of Truth pulled the dervish's head back by the hair and pressed dagger blade to his throat. Erendrel regarded the dervish impassionately, though he seethed inside.
   "One more time," Erendrel said.
   "I told ya all I know," the dervish responded. "I saw them dark fae with a bundle what were writhing as filled with snakes. Then they takes off on a carpet."
   "Where?" Erendrel asked.
   "Looked like it were toward the Butcherblock Mountians, but how would I know?"
   Erendrel nodded, satisfied that the captive was telling the truth, or at least something near enough to the truth to be valuable. But Butcherblock could not provide the kidnappers with allies or safety. The must have gone somewhere else.
   "Shall I have this scum killed, barrashar?" Ishara asked.
   Erendrel turned to the Caliph of Truth, shaking his head. "No. But I would be grateful if you would hold him for a day or two to give me time to pick up the trail."
   Ishara nodded, a small smile forming on his lips. "You will owe me many Coin and Blades Tokens for this, Qeynosian."
   "It will be my pleasure to provide them upon my return."
   Erendrel bowed to Ishara and took his leave from the Court of Truth, hastening to the docks n Sinking Sands where he took the carpet to Butcherblock. Though he was convinced the two insane Arasai had taken their captives to Darklight Woods, the information provided by the dervish offered another possibility. The answer, he believed, lay in Gorowyn.
   Leaving the carpet at the Butcherblock docks, Erendrel whistled for Sycorax. Sparks flew from the destrier's hooves as Erendrel spurred him to the gallop racing across the flagstones of the docks to the beach. The transport to Gorowyn lurked above the sands to the north of the docks. Erendrel wasted no time getting there. Roughly shoving the griffon tamer aside, he leapt from Sycorax to the griffon's back. The beast took flight, conveying Erendrel to Timorous Deep.
   The lifts and platforms of Gorowyn caused Erendrel no little difficulty, but they did not deter him. The first level yielded nothing of value, nor did the Shadowed Seminary offer much.
He searched the Gorowyn Assembly, and the Arcane Erudition to no avail. Gnashing his teeth in frustration, he hurried back to the main lift, and took it to the next level. Just beyond the Academy of Warfare, Erendrel found another conveyance to carry him over the chasm within which Gorowyn was built. There, in the market area he spied a Sarnak, and tied to the lizard's belt was a scrap of cloth that matched the color and fabric of Callysta's robe. A moment later he heard a scream, and drew his sword....

[Lyrima]

Kiaria rises gracefully to her feet as the elemental spawns.  With a moue of disappointment, she, too, starts waving her arms and murmuring an incantation.  Storm clouds gather in the small room...

[Orrernoeth]

As attention is turned towards her earth elemental, Aluini starts a new incantation, then points at the arisai in front of the paint, with that her aqueous horse attacks.

[Jezerai]

Callysta stamps her foot.  "You broke my mez!"  Crossing her arms petulantly, she huffs with indignation.  "You spank it, you tank it!"

Recovering from her fit of pique, she begins to cast as well.

[Orrernoeth]

Glares at Callysta and Kiaria.

"You silly girls!  I guess you can stay here and keep the mezz going and playing with bug wings if you want, but I want to go home!"

[Jezerai]

"You mean we aren't going to ... "  Callysta looks thoughtful.  "Well, even though they deserve death for sticking me in a stinky bag and shoving rags in my mouth, I'd rather go home!  I have a pile of magazines to read and I still have to finish painting my toenails!"

[Cataclysta]

Still frozen from the invasive attempted "touching" by Kiaria, or possibly from Callysta's mez, the tiny Arasai's eyes turn to Callysta.

Lizzzten to me you prizzy Elvz!  Why don't you juzt be quiet and ztill for a minute!  Mezz yourzelf or something!  You're giving me a headache!  Jeezzz you don't need that Aneurizm zpell, you ARE an aneurizm!

Meanwhile, Aluini's pet approaches the Arasai , looking very mean.  The Arasai snaps out of its close encounter with Kiaria and flies to a corner of the room.

Zizter!  I told you we should've put zome zort of magnetic field over thiz plaze!  Now all the prizzy elvzz are uzing magic!

Flustered and unable to get a handle on the precarious elves, she gives up and pulls at her hair in desperation.

You know what?!!  Why don't you all juzt call back to your hallz!  And none of you are very zmart either!  All thiz time, youzz could've juzt called home obviouzly becauze we forgot to block your magic!  I've had it with you!  You are too high maintenanze for uz!  For Ro'z zake!  Who can put up with all of youzz?! 

You can keep your jum jumz and your zpaz and your Halfling Orphanz hairz!  Go home!  Take Zcorching'z painting with you too!  I don't want to ever be reminded of youzz lot!

Wonders if there's a hunting party coming after the Artists...

Oh and....could we juzt forget thiz little inzident, eh?  Youzz know....erm....in caze they azk what we look like?  You know, we were juzt playing......

Gives the girls a toothy grin and throws some fireworks for dramatic effect as she casts Invisibility on herself and vanishes from viewing.

BUT WE WILL BE BACK, ZAGA!  YOU'LL ZEE!   FEAR UZ!!